the will of man
The human will is thought to be free, a necessity for love. They say, love is not love if it is not free to not love. Yes, love gives the freedom to turn away, yet it also pursues and woos. Though we may live in constant rebellion, God remains in constant pursuit.
Yet I wonder, is the will of man truly free? Or is our will surrendered to our pain, blinded by it, unable to see clearly? A father wound, the abandonment or emotional unavailability of a father, leaves many of us unable to believe in a heavenly one.
I want to challenge the notion of a neutral, rational, and free will. A truly rational will would require omniscience. We can only decide with perfect reason if we possess all information and knowledge. But only God is omniscient, and He knows it too. Maybe He never expected us to be rational choosers in the first place. Maybe He knows that our confident rejection of Him is merely our pain crying out and our lack of knowledge of His never-ending goodness.
He sees the tinted glasses through which we view the world. He knows that hurt people hurt people. He has seen every minute of our lives, every rejection, every abuse, every neglect. His mercies never come to an end (Lamentations 3:22–23); they are new every morning.
Maybe He is patient with us until we finally glimpse His goodness and choose Him. Maybe His mercies go beyond death and are new the very next morning, reaching beyond the limits of our earthly lives. Gently, they shine on our closed eyes like the morning sun, awakening us from our slumber to His eternal goodness. Love does not leave the other in everlasting self-inflicted pain. It gently reveals the truth.
I want to propose that every human being would choose God if they truly knew who He is. God’s goodness is irresistible. It touches that God-shaped hole in our hearts that Blaise Pascal spoke of.
It is God’s will that everyone would come to the knowledge of Him. Calvinism says He doesn’t want to. Arminianism says He can’t. But what if He wills, and His will will come true?
To know God is to love Him. To not love Him is to not truly know Him. Just as the painted sky of a sunset draws our hearts in wonder, so does the goodness of God draw the human heart. Not wanting God is simply saying no to the God we imagine Him to be.
We are only truly free when we choose God. I propose that the will of man is only free when it chooses true and eternal goodness, God Himself.